Where are they now?

It’s not just a Barry Manilow song or an episode on VH1. It’s what I’m asking myself about some of my long lost friends.

Where is Adrianne from high school? She used to work at the library downtown.

Where is Wes from Hamburger Express, my first job? I really wanted to sleep with him.

Where is Mike from Handy Andy? I almost did sleep with him.

Where is God? We used to work together at Domino’s Pizza. I think he’s still in Cincinatti.

Where is Jeffery, my favorite queen. We worked together at Papa John’s in the Falls. Last I heard he was in New York working for Nike. He was so cute to me………if I could only take some clippers to his wild @ss fro!!!

Where is Addie from Legend? That b!tch was plain crazy. She was soooo much fun!!! I never got to know her as well as I wanted.

Where is Ethel? We met in 1991………she liked the handcuffs on my rearview mirror. Whore. Last I heard she was in Pa. She responds to my e-mails…but the replies are short and don’t feel comfortable. We had a falling out of sorts, but nothing really worth holding a grudge for……in my opinion anyway.

Where is Steph? She was the coolest thing since ice cream. I heard she went from Canton to the Falls. Why don’t we stay in touch?

Where is Lisa? She’s a lot of fun. I wonder if she’s still taking a dozen steps all the time……is she driving now?

Where are K & C? Oh yeah, I got them back. They just bought a house in the Falls. We once had a falling out……but nobody can stay mad at Honey Ha for very long. K weighs 5 pounds now and has mellowed much. C is still the same. Thank God!!!! I dearly love that strange strange bird.

Where is Tana? Half the time I hated her, but the other half she was so f#cking cool!!! I hope she’s well.

Where is the Queen Bee? I had always heard that she was the wicked witch of everywhere………but hours and hours of sitting at her feet after work showed me that she is such a wonderful person with a heart the size of the world. She still lives in the Falls……I don’t know why we don’t talk more.

Where is Paige? Did I say the wrong thing, or just say it the wrong way?

Where is Lois? I can’t stand that heiffa, but inside I hope she is well.

Rosa? I believe she went to California. Not geographically…………but she’s there none the less. Of course only Steph, Tana, and maybe K will know what I mean by that. I have dreams about her, but my phone doesn’t have all the numbers to get in contact with her. I truly hope with all my heart that I one day get to visit her there……at least for one last dance.